LEAVING IS A DOUCHE

I am ready to go. But not ready to leave. Because LEAVING IS A DOUCHE.

I don't want to say goodbye to people I love. I am not ready to leave them. Family, new friends, old loves, new problems. LEAVING IS A DOUCHE.

I don't want to say goodbye to people who will swoop in at the last minute, pretending they have been there for the past year. YOU ARE A DOUCHE.

I don't want to spend my last four days disappointed, because DISAPPOINTMENT IS DOUCHE.

I don't want to fill out the divorce papers in a mad rush just because I am leaving, because DIVORCE IS A DOUCHE. And it is hard, regardless of how long you've been separated.

Oh and for you: You want 3 months worth of rent as a security deposit to live there for 2 months?? hmmmmm....DOUCHE.

And tying a pretty ribbon on things just because I'm leaving is next to impossible, because LEAVING IS A DOUCHE.

Some dumbass once said, "There is no end. Only new beginnings..."

Well, the person who said that is a DOUCHE!

It's like when a dog has diahhrea- he shits in a pile, walks four feet and shits out another pile. He doesn't look back. "Only new beginnings..." and new, smelly shit.

Now let's party.