BLOG CHALLENGE 7: My(Space) Love advice

Myspace has changed the way we live and LOVE......

I used to know when my boyfriend was super mad at me because he spit in my face.

Now, I know something is VERY wrong when he deletes my comment, picture, or the WORST- my friendship. It was easier when he spit on me!

Before, at the end of a relationship, I would just delete his number, give away his sweater, and be done with it. NOW, I have to set my page to private, delete him as a friend, AND post a thinly-veiled blog about how I found this new young indie band- and it's SO much better than the old one I used to listen to. (Mostly because their bass guitar is much bigger).

Or maybe write a poem about how I killed a badger outside my sun room, JUST IN TIME.

Before, if I wanted to check up on a guy I'm dating, I would just borrow his cell phone while he was in the bathroom, write down all the numbers of girls he's called recently, and call them all one by one posing as a carpet cleaning business. "I'm sure you'll need to speak to your husband before you make any decisions. Oh you don't have a husband? Your boyfriend? Yes, and what was his name??"

NOW, I have to do all kinds of research, or SPYSPACING, as I like to call it. I have to figure out which girls are posting comments on his page, who those girls are, and what he's saying on THEIR pages. And because most of those girls' pages are set to private, that usually involves creating fake accounts, "friending" those slutty whores, posing as someone who "knows a friend of theirs," or a photographer who wants to "offer free headshots to build my portfolio" because they "are very photogenic."

Not to mention keeping tabs on all the updates:

He added a new picture? Who is that girl?

He updated his profile?? That means you have to scour his page to see what has changed….

Changed his Background?? (he never changed his background while WE were dating!)

He added a new Song? (Is that a love song? A message to me? Or does that mean he's seeing someone new?)

Who is that in his top friends? I've never seen HER before!? Is that the Shelly that he works with??

Myspace is supposed to keep us all connected….but really, it's just making everyone more psycho.

Not to mention…IT'S LIKE A SECOND JOB!

Thank God I'm only working part-time now...